What Sex can do

1 It makes some people
religious : Oh my God!
Yes! My God!

2 It gives some people
their first musical
lesson : mmmm .aaaahh

3 Makes some people
natural competitors :
Ffaaast! Fasterrr! Yeah

4 It makes some people
announce their own
obituary : Ahh you are
killing me! I’m dead! I’m
finished! You’ll kill me!

5 It makes some ladies
become terrorists :
Destroy it! Don’t show
any damn mercy! Just
tear it! Don’t do it with
mercy! I am not your sister. Do it harder!

6 Others become
respectful : Give it to me
please.. please …. please
I’m begging…..

7 Loyalty : I love you!
You are my life! I’m yours
forever! You are the
best! Say whatever you
want. Jack me any how
and it’s yours!

8 Makes some people
become beggers : Yeah
please don’t stop! Please
I beg in God’s name give
it to me! Please give it to
me again!

Courtesy-Nneamaka Okafor.


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Our Be(un)loved

You came just yesterday

You are not the first

Might be the last

Right before you are sins of Khaki saints

Darker than charcoal

Leaving you on procold

Even when your name should be in gold,

You once had no shoes

“Who knows if you had a singlet?”

And doors keep opening for you

All is well

A thunderstorm uphill

It sweeps across as you always shivered

“Are you not Commander in Chiefs?”

No, you are not a commander in thieves

Where is Farouk?

Lamido will adore him with Five thousand naira note

Rueben will issue a statement even on blood sucking mosquitoes

Okupe an attack lion while jungle remainth empty,

Tea on sliced cassava bread

No lunch?

Try cocoyam buns,

NEPA has buried cancerous generators,

Roads are not worthy

How safe is Miss DANA in the sky?

Let all MAULAGs muah muah

We shall smile for a better tomorrow

Our beloved president.